A Word about Self-Control

A lot of times when people get upset at others, they use language that puts the other person in a manipulative position saying things such as, “don’t make me go off on you,” or “you made me feel this way.” This is the wrong approach. And it may be hard to hear because it’s very seldom that people want to be blamed for their own shortcomings, but the truth is it is nobody’s fault but your own if you flip someone the bird.

If you allow yourself to go off on someone to the point where you disrespect them verbally or non-verbally, it was not necessarily their fault. This shows that you were drawn away by your own temptation to make them feel bad. Even if someone entices you continually, you have no right to blame them for making you react a certain way. By blaming the offender, you are letting them know that they have control over your emotions.

There’s a correct way to handle everything. You hold the power to let things roll off your chest. It’s called having self-control. Stop blaming other people for what you can’t control of yourself. No one can make you do anything.

One thing I learned in my younger years from seeing a skit put on by the Kaiser Permanente Educational Theatre was the use of Peace Signs “Stop, Think, Act” (there was a song that went to this and I remember the chorus to this day) to handle conflict.

When someone offends you, you need to STOP by refraining from instantly reacting, THINK about your options for responding positively, and ACT on it. This may sound corny, but if it works for the many children who hear this same concept, then it can work for adults as well. 

It is not impossible to handle things in a better manner.

Just do it!